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Relationships and Sex With an Ostomy

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A Guide to Sex with an Ostomy

[uvc-youtube id=”MlHNHaUEbh8″ width=”560″ height=”315″ autoplay=”0″ controls=”1″]

My (ex) boyfriend (don’t worry, we’re still friends) and I discuss sex and relationships…having IBD and an ostomy! We try to answer the burning sexual questions without making it too awkward for anybody.

Before we get started, let’s cut to the chase and let it be known that for most ostomates, a stoma has little effect over the ability to enjoy sex, regardless of sexual preferences or lifestyle before surgery.

Sexuality and ostomy are complex subjects with many facets: the physical, emotional, and psychological pressures are major influences in ones’ life. Let’s break down these issues down to discuss the physical considerations (both after surgery and ongoing) and then the psychological and emotional considerations for sex and ostomy.

Physical (Post-Surgical)

There are many potential physical issues with sex within the first few months after surgery for a new ostomate. Depending on the type of surgeries done, medications administered, and what parts were affected is going to determine the viability of your sex life. But most of the anxieties of post-surgery ostomates about sex are alleviated after a few months and most find they can have sex just the same as before they had their surgery.

Some of the issues faced by post-op ostomates are:

1) Initial anxiety due to physical changes & fear of injury
2) Feelings of loneliness or a sense of rejection
3) Inability to achieve an erection / lubrication / orgasm.

Sex Tips for Post-Op Ostomates

Read more At: Guide to Sex with an Ostomy

24 Responses to "Relationships and Sex With an Ostomy"

  1. bayougrande   April 28, 2014 at 12:38 pm

    I wonder if there is anyone out there with an ostomy fetish.?

    Reply
  2. Dolly Black   April 28, 2014 at 1:10 pm

    How did the surgery go? Was it painful/difficult? How long ago was it?
    You’re very brave! ?

    Reply
  3. Jason Jordan   April 28, 2014 at 1:37 pm

    you guys are great. my girlfriend (fiance as of this thanksgiving) was very
    comfortable with my ileostomy when i had it. and its so important to be
    confident in yourself as well. i named my stoma Gordon lol. all my friends
    would ask how gordons doing when ide go out.?

    Reply
  4. erin Vogler   April 28, 2014 at 2:25 pm

    This world needs more people like you and your boyfriend. I think you are a
    hero in my eyes I don’t have what you have but I can now understand more
    about something that at first made me very nervous to say the least. I
    actually feel guilty for my initial thoughts about this topic. I am not one
    to label or judge so when I had these uneasy feeling about this particular
    subject I said to myself shame on you …just learn about it and I have
    done my research and I found you. I think you should write a book or
    something you need to reach more people that share your experience. God
    bless you beautiful girl?

    Reply
  5. william macareno   April 28, 2014 at 2:57 pm

    wanted to know if you wanted to go out sometime????

    Reply
  6. FoodiesLikeUs   April 28, 2014 at 3:32 pm

    Your videos are very informative. Thank you for making it real. ?

    Reply
  7. Draco Malfoi   April 28, 2014 at 3:49 pm

    Really liked your video. As a Crohn’s patient myself, I was just kind of
    curious about how you named her Trixie. I named mine Rudolph, as he came
    around Christmas with a big red nose.?

    Reply
  8. Frank Patterson   April 28, 2014 at 3:54 pm

    Good job, I have had mine for 14 yrs and glad to see younger people dealing
    with this in a very adult way. Your who your are and your very cute! I am
    57 and still get a bet up tight about being up and about with mine but what
    you said about being a jerk repellant is great. I wish the best for you and
    your boy friend. You will have a great life with your attitude.?

    Reply
  9. rickykenji   April 28, 2014 at 4:35 pm

    I got colostomy I get made fun of cause of it?

    Reply
  10. jblai05   April 28, 2014 at 4:52 pm

    You both are very inspirational and brave, and created a casual, direct,
    mature (and funny!) handling of such a sensitive topic. My mother had an
    appliance for several years, and I did learn and help her with it. It sure
    changes one’s priorities in life, so thanks for talking about the big ones,
    love, companionship, and quality people. You both are very cute, all the
    Best of to you!?

    Reply
  11. Anthony Brandt   April 28, 2014 at 5:02 pm

    Omg I’ve never heard of this disease?

    Reply
  12. Dolly Black   April 28, 2014 at 5:56 pm

    How did the surgery go? Was it painful/difficult? How long ago was it?
    You’re very brave! ?

    Reply
  13. misskat1985   April 28, 2014 at 6:10 pm

    You are an amazing couple. Your boyfriend is lovely.

    Reply
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    This will be a great website, would you be interested in doing an interview regarding just how you created it? If so e-mail me!

    Reply
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    Reply
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